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You can find an age mate, or you could find someone who really doesn't care about age.

I don't think that all men pick on the basis of age.

So if you really like this guy, at some point you should open up more of your world to him. But I think most of the things that apply to heterosexual relationships have resonance with same-sex relationships.

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And it's easy to grow apart because you're not sharing day-to-day life.That said, I know people who had HUGE distances between them and survived that and ended up committed and together.You can go online late at night and you can use your lunch hour to have coffee with the people you meet. The important point is that people who have kids learn pretty quickly that they need someone who also has kids, and guys are going to look for that, too.Just remember, if something terrible happened — let's say you had to go to a funeral — you'd find the time for it. Question from Denise: I'm in school, working and a mother of 7- and 15-year-olds. They want someone who has the capacity to understand children's needs, just like you do.So it's not easy, but if it's really important to both of you, and both of you work at it, it can have a good outcome.

Question from Lois: What about trips that are only for singles?

Do I have to find an 80-year-old to be the younger woman?

PS: No you don't, although there are some great 80-year-olds out there!

I think people should go out with the people they are attracted to.

We don't call Demi Moore a cougar — we just think of her as beautiful, famous, talented, and with good taste. But I don't think that attraction is all about how you look. And if you pick somebody who you feel good with, your friends will be happy for you. You will be around someone who shares your passions, and have a lot to discuss.

I'm trying to find someone who will accept me and my kids. Question from Betty: What attracts a mature male to a mature woman once the hormones have stopped?